? You lose arguments with inanimate objects.
? You have to hold onto the lawn to keep from falling off the earth.
? Job interfering with your drinking.
? Your doctor finds traces of blood in your alcohol stream.
? Career won't progress beyond Senator of Massachusetts.
? The back of your head keeps getting hit by the toilet seat.
? Sincerely believe alcohol to be the elusive 5th food group.
? 24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case - coincidence?? - I think not!
? Two hands and just one mouth... - now THAT'S a drinking problem!
? You can focus better with one eye closed.
? The parking lot seems to have moved while you were in the bar.
? Your twin sons are named Barley and Hops.
? Hey, 5 beers has just as many calories as a burger, screw dinner!
? Mosquitoes catch a buzz after attacking you
? At AA meetings you begin: "Hi, my name is... uh..."
? Your idea of cutting back is less salt.
? You wake up in the bedroom, your underwear is in the bathroom, you fell asleep clothed. - hmm.
? The whole bar says 'Hi' when you come in...